Good news, bad news, and I'm still scared, yes

Friday, January 04, 2008 at 10:08 AM

Wellsiree Bob, the Iowans (why does that sound like an alien race on a planet orbiting Tau Ceti?) cast their votes, and we now have the beginnings of a real mess.

Some of the news is quite surprising. Some ain't the least bit surprising in the least.....

Okay, to the good side of things: Obama turned in a surprising performance, despite the "safe money" crowd thinking it was going to Shillary, eh? We're told lots of "kids" went and demanded, well, a change from the Beltway SOP methodoligies of the past so many decades. If change they want, by golly and gumdrops, they sure said as much.

Edwards is not to be counted out...yet. We may be looking at a run for veep, and frankly, that's not that bad an idea, yes. I look for more of him, especially come New Hampshire, which has a different political angle than staid old Tau Ceti, mmm?

Shillary! Wow! Despite being the Illuminati's pet choice! Gee, apparently she doesn't connect with the women as was thought. Mmm. Perhaps it's got something to do with her ties to the fascist cause? Could be.

Biden and Chris Dodd are outa here. Biden? Mister Bankuptcy Reform himself? I'd sooner vote for a used car. I can sell the car easier. Dodd? He never was a frontrunner, this is to be expected, but he can now go back to work and undo Biden/Chimperor's misdeeds....we hope.

And now to the bad:

Ah, Hucklebee. Read between the lines here: Das Chimpenfuehrer II. Same crowd of bible-thumping redneck reactionaries, of course, same as 00 and 04, true? Where's KKKarl this time? One can smell his stench 194,277 light years from here.

Of course, Hucklebee's PR is based on the same tried-and-vomitus formula: Wave bible, here come the voters. Here we go again.

Except? This may backfire horribly for the Rethugs, who go into this race facing one hellatious handicap before the betting windows close: GWB.

Yes. One can already see, in one's mind, the way the Dem ads will operate: "You want the same crap AGAIN? Four more years of Bush Junior?"

Yeah, that's a handicap to think about, Rethugs. Try again.

Interesting is where uber-populist Ron "spambot" Paul landed...5th place. This is a sign that the Rethug populist needs to think less about toting blimps down I-95 (we saw it, yes, looked, well, phallic!) and about getting out of this race. Why?

Simple, he's against what the Corporati want, of course. The Corporati want Shillary and Downer, they'll settle for Hucklebee, yes. Or Julie. Not some populist crazy person, no.

All in all, it was a neat thing, but, by no means, is this even close to over. Iowans have a cruddy track record. We've other states to test, yes, including us down here, too.

Meanwhile? Stay warm. It ain't over.


Your ignorance of the Ron Paul campaign is overwhelming. If you had done any actual research you would know that the Ron Paul blimp phenomenon is done completely by Ron Paul supporters and not by the official campaign.

I guess my "spambot" joke fell flat. My bad.

Oh, and an update. Seems the Dems are most happy, while the Rethugs are in a tizzy over the Iowa stuff. A quick roundup of all the blogs and the yattering concerning such.

Apparently, Chucklebee's win didn't sit well with a few. As a prog, allow me say: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Now, back to the show...

"Your ignorance of the Ron Paul campaign is overwhelming."

Not overwhelming enough; to reach that exalted state, I'd have to have been spared any awareness of it at all.

Has anyone else seen the apparent internet hoax about mercury being the "active ingredient" in Merck's flu vaccine? I saw one post of this which incorporated a quote from Dr. Paul on the evils of mandatory vaccination.

Just a coincidence that the hoax and Dr. Paul came wrapped together? I'm just asking. Anyone in the spambot crowd want to respond?

Just in case any readers thought that the criticism of Ron Paul spambots was harsh or undeserved, try running the following Google search:


Posting after posting after posting using the same language and treating Paul's candidacy with the same zeal usually reserved for religious matters.


As for Iowa, never underestimate the hostility of Iowans to globalization. Way back in November, the Wall Street Journal ran a piece on how Iowans didn't trust that phenomenon.

Residents of that state have already seen the family farm, which used to be the symbol of the state, sold off to corporate megafarms. Now they are seeing the related industries close down or downsize as the jobs are sent overseas. Bye-bye Amana, shrinking John Deere, hello meat packing plants run largely with illegal immigrant labor.

Clinton--associated with NAFTA.

Obama--sounding like he understands that current policy is killing us.

Edwards--making populist anti-corporate noise.

Romney--looks and talks like the guys who bought the farms and closed the businesses.

Huckabee--making populist, anti-corporate noise.

Iowa can be very insular (I went to school there for 2+ years) and very atypical of the US, but Iowans tend to be pretty well educated. They may be too religious for my liking, but they can tell when their way of life is swirling down the porcelain hillside.

In a way, the overall Iowa "litmus test" say so very much: The masses are not getting the Corporati jokes anymore! The margins were very wide, Shillary got as many "yays" as Chucklebee, so, that's a neat laugh, yes.

Change, as the late and so dear Barbara Jordan told us, change. We're trying, m'am, we are trying, despite the reactionaries.

The laughable part has been the effing Rethug blogs, oh, yeah, I went to them all and just howled my ass off. Limbaugh, Hannity, Malkin, they are each apoplectic! I love it!

"Oh, golly, you mean you asswipes didn't realize you created this Frankenstein's monster called the Fundie Voter? And now that monster is still out there loose? Hey, don't blame us progs!"

And yes, I did deliberately stick that Paul mention in, to test somebody's bot software. I am convinced the Paul Army employs some hefty hackers, oh, yes. Rcade? You reading this? Maybe next time, I need to speak about R** ***l, to avoid the spambot attacks, mmm?

Over and out.