What Difference, Pray Tell?

Wednesday, May 24, 2006 at 04:18 AM

Being a rather snarky cynic at times, socialist and all-around wiseacre, there are times I especially take such perverted delight in four little words..."I told you so!"

Some time back, I got into a pretty heated argument with some associates who attempt to pass themselves off as, ahem, Christians.


One point in this debate was my declaration: "You guys and those fundie militant Muslims, there is no difference in you whatsoever, none."

The resulting tintinbulation was like pushing the throttles from 45 percent to full 100 N1: We're going up, kiddies. Righteous indignation? But, of course! "We're NOTHING like THEY are!!"

Well, being snarky, guess who did a cut-n-paste in an email to them? I know, I should be ashamed, who me? NEVER!

See, my point was and always is: Pot calling the kettle black, are we?

Ah, Dan Brown's silly defective novel...oops..detective novel, I mean, The DaVinci Code. 60 meg sold. Cute story based on In Search Of type data, you know, sheer speculation? Wishful thinking? UFO's, parapyschology, Big Foot, The Bermuda Triangle kind of...ahem....well, science it ain't. It's all based on poor research, and yes, to date, it's clear, gee, it's all made up stuff.

Ergo, fiction.

So, this work becomes a movie. Said movie is raking in some serious dough. I find no fault with that, hey, if I could pen something and con Paramount into paying me the rights? Just a matter of negotiating the size airplane for my retirement home, eh? Beech King Air, thanks!

But....and more proof to my opinion that militant fundie Xtians are no better than their militant fundie Islamic counterparts, well, well, and well!

Oh, yeah, baby, as it seems that Dan Brown now is now to be hated and possibly hunted like Salmon Rushdie. MmmHmm.

Rushdie? Oh, yeah, he's the author of that other work of fiction, The Satanic Verses. If we recall, that work got him a death sentence handed to him by some pious schmuck. Rushdie lives like a KGB agent in Nashville, always watching his back, oh, aren't those militant fundie Muslims such sweet kids?

Yep. I send the above html around to these same self-righteous and indignant militant fundie Xtians. "Here be my proof. No appreciable difference, see? You guys would kill to shut the mouth of a critic, and gee, do we need to rehash stuff like, oh, The Inquistion? Or dear old John Calvin and his little bloodletting? Don't wax my rotors, sirs, ladies."

"Again, no difference. You're the same childish clowns."

See, it's like this, WTW fans: I learned long ago, that certain religions come with a viral-like attack mechanism, one that kicks in anytime someone cocks their head slightly, and dares propose "I have my doubts about your statements."

At which point, it's like something out of Biological Warfare 201: They raise their shields, and start attacking, shooting off with the same accuracy of the fictional Vogons, oh, they hurl stuff left and right, but in most cases, they shoot too wild to do any good.

The Last Temptation Of Christ, Monthy Python's Life Of Brian. Stuff like this comes out and the fundies start acting like Klingons. And why? Can't take a little speculative thinking in places? Or a series of silly goofs and satire about "cult of personality"?

And now this stuff of DaVinci. As story ideas go, about as clever as the worst Star Trek stuff. It's all hooey, an idea, but without any real merit: The so-called "facts"...aren't.

Now, Brown's under a death sentence. Lovely, eh? And for what?

Simple: Criticism of any sort exposes the very real possibility that someone just might think for themselves, turn off the gospel, exit the cathedral...and do their own thing. They cannot risk that, why, would we have then?

Peace? Quiet? A world in love with their fellow man? Mutual goals? Laughter? "I think, therefore, I am"?

Yeah. And gee, nobody to die for their ideas, either, wow, what a concept!