Saturday, June 24, 2006 at 04:43 PM

Some people think Fux News serves no useful purpose.  Those people would be wrong.  Few people realize that Fux News is owned by the Society To Aid Young Propagandists-In-Greed (this organization can be researched on standard Charitable Organization Indexes by searching for STAYPIG).

Without the aid and comfort provided by STAYPIG to those purveyors of propaganda and greed, the country would be infinitely worse off.  Why, we'd virtually be a nation only of the sane, with no representation at all of the viewpoint of the insane.  Where could those on the far side of reason go to be heard?  Could Ayn Coulter count on being heard without STAYPIG?

In like manner, there would be a serious loss of input into the national debate from those who find dollars more comforting and more sexy than humans.  How would we know the burdens and hurts of the rich without the heartfelt thanks of the Kneel Kaputos of STAYPIG?

Where would be the raised voice of unreason without Sawin' Vannity?

Nay, I say to those who feel that Fux Sux, do not bleat endlessly into the bleak and endless void; embrace the value added to our frail existence by the marginal oinks of STAYPIG.  Sing its praises thusly:

STAYPIG, STAYPIG, have you any fools?

Yes sir, yes sir, 24 hours full.

STAYPIG forever!!!!!